Christmas happiness

I read a little while back that some researchers were surprised that the more well off in this country were not necessarily happier than the poor. Why does this idea persist that "money=happiness"? Haven't they heard of the old adage, "Money can't buy you happiness" (and, of course, its rider, "but at least you can be miserable in comfort")?

And in yesterday's Guardian, an article by Larry Elliott, its Economics Editor, blew out of the water the idea that Christmas is a peak time for suicides. He says it's not. In fact, statistically, in December, the suicide rates are down. Christmas actually "cheers them up. Generally, it makes them happier rather than sadder."

The myth about suicides is probably put about by humanists who want to discredit Christmas. But their cover has been blown! People actually enjoy the preparation for 25th December and the time off work, gatherings of family and friends, good food and, of course, the giving and receiving of presents.

I did a straw poll at our Christmas Day service to see whether people preferred giving presents or receiving them. The "givers" had it. Although it may be that people thought that's what I wanted them to say, or that's what they ought to say! Or, maybe not! Maybe people really DO enjoy giving presents!

Of course, things may go downhill in January, when the credit card bills come in, but even so, we like to spend to give - and that's rather nice, I think. Elliott commented that those thrifty people of fiction, Silas Marner and Scrooge are "two of the most pitied characters in English literature".

Good point!

And when Mr. Cameron's new happiness index gets into gear in the New Year , we will all know how happy we are!

Mind that Battery

In amongst the grandchildren's toys were some helpful instructions about batteries, which are needed by so many of those toys. An A4 sheet, printed on both sides, told us how to use batteries in toys. Yes, TWO sides of an A4 sheet. OK, there were pictures and it was in 12 languages, but even so ...

I like, "Batteries should be replaced by an adult". Actually some children are probably better at this than their parents!

Of course, some (important) instructions can't easily be pictured, but that doesn't stop them. Like, "Remove dead batteries and all batteries from toys which are not going to be used for a long time ..."

Also, of course, "Non-rechargeable batteries are not to be re-charged". Actually, the clue is in the name "Non-rechargeable".

Well, I hope you've learned from this useful tuition. But I have to ask, "Are we really this stupid?"

Christmas Day

It's 10.30 pm and the rest of the household are in bed! But I must admit we didn't go to bed until about 2 am this morning. We went to our local Anglican Midnight Communion and saw Christmas in that way. Which was a very nice way to do it. Including a good sermon from Colin the vicar.

Then it was our morning service - about three quarters of an hour of Christmas Day praise. It included the allegory of Claude and Carol Candle (well, you had to be there!) and my Christmas meditation, God came down at Christmas, which I will try to blog when I get the opportunity (it's so old I only have a "hard copy").

It has been a nice day - just three of us, including my sister-in-law. Tomorrow is the family day - on the floor with the grandchildren, probably playing "sardines in the dark"! That will also be a good day!

As for today we had a lovely three-meat roast - as advertised in Aldi. And very nice it was, too. I even had four sprouts! We played Yahtzee (that's a blast from the past - but I bought it in a charity shop recently) and Crazy Cuts; a simple game where you are given the name of an object on a card and you have to cut it out from a piece of paper and the first person to recognise what it is gets a point - and so does the cutter. Simple, but actually good fun! Thank you to our Barnet friends for buying it for us!

We also watched Dr. Who - well I had to as someone bought me a pair of Dr. Who socks for Christmas! A bit more silly than usual I thought. Not as patch on the Christmas edition which featured Kylie Minogue a few years ago.

Well, that's our Christmas. Not long to Boxing Day now. Although I've been told if you Google "Boxing Day" it doesn't happen on a Sunday. So Boxing Day is officially Monday - yes I know your diary says it's Sunday, but what do they know?

I hope you had a lovely Christmas also. Keep the Light of the World central to your heart and life.

Do Gooding

Did you catch Ian Hislop's "Age of the Do-Gooders" on BBC recently? He looked at various reformers in the Victorian age and, rather than poke fun at them, as people are wont to do, he took them seriously and realised how society had benefited from their work and campaigning.

Among the people he looked at were Wilberforce, Barnardo, Lord Shaftesbury and Gladstone. They helped abolish slavery, stopped children being sent down mines and up chimneys to work, campaigned against drink and sexual immorality and much more besides.

It was interesting how many of them were "evangelical Christians", as Hislop pointed out. The Christians were mocked then and continue to be mocked in many quarters today, for their "do gooding". But it's a force that still has a great effect.

I saw recently the figure of £3m estimated as what it would cost governemnt to run all the work that Christian charities and churches do now for the community, much in a voluntary capacity. And in general it's work done well, as people are motivated by love and wanting to serve. In other words to be Christ like in their lives.

Well done Mr. Hislop for your programme and your look at the Victorian "do-gooding". I also enjoy you on Have I Got News for You, by the way!

Christmas Nativity continued

The second epsisode of The Nativity was on last night (see blog entry below for the 1st episode). Things are beginning to happen! Mary learns she is to have a baby by the Holy Spirit. She goes off to visit her cousin Elizabeth.

The Magi continue to debate the impending conjucntion of heavenly bodies and have an interesting discussion about whether God interacts with his people or not. Three Magi decide to leave to head for Judea.

In the meantime, poor old shepherd Thomas has some of his flock taken to 'pay' his taxes and the medicine for his sick wife has run out.

Then Mary has to return to Nazareth, but it's obvious by now she is pregnant. What will Joseph say and do? Cue cliffhanger ending to be continued tonight!

Christmas Nativity

Last night saw the first episode of a four-part drama entitled The Nativity on BBC1. It's a re-telling of the Christmas story and it's on at prime time - 7 pm. It's ousted The One Show leading up to Christmas. Chris Evans & Alex Jones, move over for the Nativity!

It started well last night; Mary meeting Joseph for the first time and then getting betrothed, Caspar, one of the Magi calculating there will be a conjunction of three heavenly bodies and working out the significance of it and Thomas a shepherd who's wife is ill and who can't afford to pay his taxes.

The episode ended with Gabriel visiting Mary with some news - you could almost hear the "thump, thump, thump" of the Eastenders music as the episode ended!

My wife quipped, "I wonder what will happen?" Actually we know, you see, we've read the book!

Penetrating the Church

I've just read this comment about the church:

We fence Jesus off from everyone, hiding him behind religious jargon, impenetrable church services, music which has no connection to popular culture. Then we have the nerve to complain that no one seems interested in religion any more. Perhaps they would be interested in Jesus, if only he wasn't hidden from sight behind the strange trappings of religion.

Although it was written about 15 years ago, it has a familiar ring! However we try to make church "accessible" (to use modern jargon), it's so easy to slip into it being an "in" club, where only those in the know really understand things.

If you go to church, next Sunday, try and view everything from the point of view, "If I'd never been here before and know little about Christianity, would I understand what was going on and would I know what I was supposed to do?"

See how you get on!

Fairtrade

A couple of weeks ago the Institute of Economic Affairs issued a fairly negative paper on Fairtrade. One is tempted to say, "Well, it would, wouldn't it?"

The trouble is, Fairtrade isn't free trade, and that's what they don't like. Their line is that free trade in the long term is best for the developing world.

Like, I suppose, "free trade" in this country where our own farmers are shafted by large multi-national supermarkets.

In a free market, when the price of, say, coffee slumps on the world market, the 3rd world producers are left penniless. How does that benefit the growers? But Fairtrade promises not to pay less than a certain price, whatever the markets do.

I was surprised and heartened to read an article in the Money section of the weekend Guardian in response to the IEA paper. It was written by the editor of Money, Patrick Collinson, who has been to Tanzania and actually seen how Fairtrade has benefited the lives of people out there. He ends his article by saying:

Fairtrade is an easy target for people who, for reasons I can't fathom, want to attack "do-gooders". We should be proud of it. It is a global movement but one that is outstandingly successful in convincing British consumers to pay that bit more to help the less fortunate. These are do-gooders who have done good.

So, don't be put off by those who try to denigrate Fairtrade. Keep buying the tea, coffee and whatever else you can get hold of!

Go to www.guardian.co.uk/money and search for "Fairtrade" for Patrick Collinson's article. The article has a link to a report on the IEA website about its paper on Fairtrade.

Post very early for Christmas

Last week we ordered a number of items over the Internet - most of them for Christmas. Then we waited for them to arrive. As both of us are often out for large parts of the day, it didn't surprise us when we found one of those notes saying they had tried to deliver a parcel.

This one was from UKMail. On the note there were two boxes the driver could tick - one to say he'd left it with a neighbour, the other to say he'd try to re-deliver tomorrow, or for us to phone a number if inconvenient. As neither boxes were ticked we decided to call the number and arrange to collect the parcel ourselves, as that was one of their options.

So, the next day my wife goes down, as arranged, after work and rings the bell at the desk, by the note asking customers to be patient if no-one comes immediately.

After ten minutes of waiting and being ignored by two people who walked through, her patience ran out! When finally someone did come, they said the driver had re-delivered it that day! But she had arranged with them to pick it up! Oh, well, he said, the telephone number on the form isn't theirs, it's another office!

Actually the parcel was NOT delivered. My wife has made a formal complaint and they are looking in to it. In the meantime, the parcel has gone missing! What a fiasco!

Welcome to the world of privatised mail.

A pill too far

I read that contraceptive pills are to be available to girls as young as 13 on the Isle of Wight. They will be available over the counter at some pharmacies, without the girl's parents or GP knowing about it. The aim, Primary Care Trust says, is to cut down teenage pregnancies.

But I haven't read of any evidence that this type of action actually works. Furthermore, what does it say to these kids? Let me suggest three things:

1. Society says it's alright to have under-age sex.
2. Society says it's OK to sleep around.
3. Society will collude with you to ignore your parents' wishes.

If this is the kind of society we now live in, then society stinks.

Hallowe'en

Yesterday was Hallowe'en. We had 17 kids knock at the door in total, although often in groups. What does one do?

In the morning I preached on the subject, and if you are really interested, your can hear it at
www.laindonbaptistchurch.org/sermons/halloween2.mp3 (the Scripture readings are heard first).

We prepared a little leaflet which we gave to the parents of those who called, and offered the children something from our basket of "goodies", which included little books with Bible stories, pencils and rubbers with either a Bible verse, or "God loves you" written on them.

The little leaflet read:

As Christians we have reservations about celebrating Halloween. We believe that it is better to celebrate things that are good and ‘light’ rather than concentrate on dark things. However we do not want to disappoint children who call at our door so hope you will allow them to take something from our basket and accept this short explanation of our views. If you want to talk further please call again or get in touch via Laindon Baptist Church.

Whether or not the leaflets were read, only God knows. But it made us feel a little happier about a rather dubious evening in our society's calendar. As I said in the sermon, at any other time of the year, if a parent allowed their child to go around knocking on the doors of complete strangers and demand gifts to prevent vandalism, they'd be reported to Social services.

To the Cinema

Earlier this evening we went to see the film Africa United. It's about a group of kids who travel across Africa to see the World Cup in South Africa. A light-hearted film which, however, managed to touch on HIV/AIDS, child soldiers and trafficking, almost without you realising it. As well, of course, addiction to football!

It was in one of the "Studios" in our local mutiplex, and it has 50 seats. My wife said, "It's obviously minority viewing." It turned out even more than we thought as we were the only people in the place!

A good evening out - why pay £1,000's for your own home cinema?

Folding your shirts

I've never been able to fold shirts nicely - or sweatshirts for that matter. That was, until we came across the Ikea chopping board!


All you have to do is lay the shirt "face down" and place the board on it, so that the board's handle is just on the collar.














Then smooth the shirt out and fold it over the edge of the board.














Then fold it up, remove board using its handle, turn the shirt over, et voila!















What's even better, the board comes in a pack of two - so that your daughter or granddaughter can fold up dolly's clothes also! (as long as it's a reasonably large dolly).













And I don't get a penny commission from Ikea!

More about signage

Another photo for you. The Council in its wisdom have put up a sign helpfully warning drivers of a roundabout and pedestrian crossing ahead.

However, if you want to go to the station, you may well miss it as the new sign just about completely blocks the station direction sign.

It makes you wonder who actually erects these signs.

A letter to the editor

I wrote a letter to the editor of one of our local newspapers but they didn't publish it. So I'll have to publish it instead!

It arose because just after Mr. Osbourne announced all his cuts, there was yet another announcement from our local council about their ambitious £1 billion project for the centre of Basildon. This time it included "inspirational plans". To fill in a bit of background, the council is currently building a big "Sporting village" and it was exposed recently that to help finance it, the Council is trying to sell off a number of open spaces.

Here's what I said:

Dear Sir

I was astounded to read all about the £1 billion revamp of the town centre of Basildon in your newspaper last week. And I thought that nice Mr. Cameron had said we‘re in a recession and need to make cutbacks! Or does Basildon Council exist in some kind of parallel universe? In fact, in the letters page last week, I read that the Council can’t even afford to trim the foliage along the highways (cutbacks halting cut backs, if you see what I mean). So how on earth is the Council going to afford all this? Or have they secretly agreed to sell off lots more open spaces around the Borough?

Another letter writer last week quite rightly bemoaned the appalling state of the Laindon Centre “regeneration”. If the Council can’t get that right, what chance has it on a £1 billion project?

Another thing I’d like to know is how much the Council has already spent out on fees to BWB to produce “inspirational plans”? How many hedges could that amount of money trimmed back?

Just to say, our own shopping centre in Laindon, mentioned above, is supposed to be redeveloped, and has been for a number of years now. But all that has happened, some years ago part of it was demolished, and hoardings surround it It really is a disgrace. One day soon I might take some pictures and share them with you.

By the way, I hope you liked the "cut back" pun in the letter.

Say cheese and let me have your passwords

The story of Google getting into trouble about their "Street View" service, where cars mounted with cameras drive round the world to obtain pictures down your street, continues. Yesterday in the paper it was reported that our privacy watchdog is investigating them after it emerged that as they drove down your street taking photos of your house, they also collected emails, usernames and passwords from any unsecured computer network they found.

Is it me? If drove down a street and took photos, I couldn't possibly - 'inadvertently' or otherwise - have collected stuff like that. It's a CAMERA, for goodness sake!

OK, OK! I realise it's a high tech camera and it's probably streaming the images in real time to a remote mainframe (see, I know the jargon!). But even so. How can you 'inadvertently' collect AND save such stuff?

Their spokesman gave the usual catchphrases. They are "profoundly sorry", they are "strengthening privacy", "more training", "better procedures", etc., etc.

It all sounds worryingly familiar doesn't it?

Spelling problems

Barstable is an area of Basildon; the Council knows that.

What it's not so sure of, is how you spell it.

Temptation

We recently looked at temptation in our Sunday service, as we have been studying the Lord's Prayer and got to "Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil". We saw that "temptation" could be seen as testing - and the object of a test is to pass it. Similarly, the object of a temptation is to not yield to it, and so come out stronger as a Christian.

We sung a hymn which has all but disappeared from recent song and hymn books, Yield not to temptation. When I re-read the words, I was struck afresh by their practical common sense and their constant reminder to look to Jesus to help us in testing times.

I got eight copies of the words laminated, so if people wanted to keep a copy, they could. I have only one copy left, so there were those who did appreciate the words!

If don't know the hymn and I have sparked an interest, here are the words:

Yield not to temptation, for yielding is sin;
Each victory will help you some other to win;
Fight manfully onward, dark passions subdue;
Look ever to Jesus, He will carry you through.

Chorus:

Ask the Saviour to help you,

Comfort, strengthen, and keep you;
He is willing to aid you,
He will carry you through

Shun evil companions, bad language disdain,
God’s name hold in reverence, nor take it in vain;
Be thoughtful and earnest, kind-hearted and true;
Look ever to Jesus, He will carry you through

All who overcome now, God will give a crown,
Through faith we will conquer, though often cast down;
He who is our Saviour, our strength will renew;
Look ever to Jesus, He will carry you through.

Horatio R. Palmer, 1868

If you want to hear it sung, there are a number of versions on YouTube

The Commonwealth Games

Did you follow the Commonwealth Games? After so much gloom and doom before they began, all seemed to go quite well really.

Paul Hobson, writing in the Baptist Times on 1 October said about the Games, "It'll be fine. It's India". And those who have been fortunate to visit the country, as we have, will know what he means.

He ends his article by saying, "Do not be surprised if the 2010 Commonwealth Games are a huge success." I think he got it right! Except, perhaps, for the fact that England came third in the medals table, behind the host nation.

Actually, on the BBC web site they had alternative ways of showing the medals table. One was medals by population. We come a miserable 18th. But out front by far is Nauru which, with one gold and one silver and a population of 10,000, they are easy winners!

You may be thinking, where on earth is Nauru? Good question! Apparently it's a Pacific Island to the north of Papua New Guinea. Economically it's not in a good state, so especially well done to the Nauruians!

My return

First of all apologies to all my loyal readers. I realise it's been some time since I blogged, but I will try and do better in the coming weeks.

As always, you can check to see how many days, hours, etc it is to Christmas on the right hand side of my blog page. Which brings me to what started me blogging again. It's the old 'chestnut' of Christmas starting too early.

This morning Chris Evans on his breakfast show said that in his village the Christmas lights are already on! And, no, it's not a test.

And in Iceland you can get "Christmas at Iceland deep fill mince pies. Best before date 25 Nov. " Can someone tell them Christmas is actually 25 DECEMBER please?

Bankers and Snails

Comments on two items of news today.

First of all, the main story of the Guardian today is about the Real IRA saying it will target UK bankers. So they are trying to win the hearts and minds of the British public then.

Even the Governor of the Bank of England admitted today the part the "financial sector" played in producing our current economic climate.

But enough of all that, the big story I heard on the news this morning was that snails have a strong homing instinct and if you want to rid them from your garden you have to take them at least 100 metres away. That means throwing them over the fence into your neighbour's garden won't work . You need to throw them at least three doors down.

But what I don't understand is this, why do they want to return home, don't they carry their home with them at all times?

Spending Cuts

When I heard last week that the Police service will need to make spending cuts, the obvious objection would be it will mean cutting back officers on the streets and crime will increase.

And, of course, it has been said. And it makes sense. From what I understand, the number of officers out there has been increasing in recent years and crime has fallen. To be honest, as they say, it's not rocket science!

But we have to make cuts! So the number of officers will be reduced and crime will go up. Then what will happen? There will be research into why crime is increasing. Consultants will be wheeled in. Long reports will be written and the "bottom line" of the reports will be there that needs to be more police out there on the streets.

And the consultants that were brought in will go away with massive fees and expenses and will be laughing all the way to the bank. But that's democracy for you.

Google-eyed

I read that Google have announced their new search engine which is so fast it can take five seconds off the time of a search. It apparently guesses (sorry, 'predicts') what you are typing in and starts to go to the appropriate (or not) websites.

So, if I do twelve Internet searches in a morning, I save a whole minute!

I'm thinking about how I can use all that extra leisure time already.

Actually, my wife pointed out that it would save even more time if, when she searched for "cheap hotels in Bath and Bristol", she did NOT get hotels in Coventry. I see that minute's leisure already disappearing before my eyes ...

Wedding anniversary today!

Yes, we've been married 41 years today. Only nine years left to the Golden one.

One of the cards, as you can see, has a window in it, and suspended by a piece of wire is a picture of two champagne glasses. A great card!

But there are hidden dangers! There is a warning on the back!

It reads:

WARNING!

Not suitable for small children under 36 months due to small parts.

Please retain for future reference.

Of course its not suitable for a baby - a baby isn't going to be celebrating a wedding anniversary!

But I must remember when the cards are taken down. I'll cut out the warning notice as I must keep it for future reference. I mean, you never know when you might need to know that kind of stuff.

Arachnophobics, don't read this.

On Friday morning Chris Evans mentioned "wing mirror spiders" on his show on Radio 2. I remember having one of them a few years ago, but not recently.

But blow me! Later that day I went out, and as I drove off, I saw I had a wing mirror spider also! So there I was, driving slowly down the road, but even so, the web was 'vibrating' madly! But he didn't want to run off and hide behind the mirror! However, reality kicked in and I began to concentrate on the road.

And soon I had forgotten about the spider and it was 60 mph down the Southend Arterial Road, and come to think of it, I haven't seen it since...

But in the evening, I noticed a larger spider in his web behind the loo at home! I ask you, how many flies will he catch there? My wife, armed with her just purchased loo brush (actually there was nothing wrong with the old one, why spend out a whole 39p on a new one?) managed to "sweep" it up, but did it get washed down the plug hole of the wash basin or did it get away?

I think it got away. Or, it's another one that's just spun its web by the computer. I think there is even less likelihood of a decent lunch there.

It's a pity really, I don't like to think of the poor thing staving to death.


P.S. to this blog - 39p loo brushes available from IKEA.

Strike averted

When the Unite union announced that their members had voted to strike in their dispute with BAA, David Cameron called on the union to halt the threat of strike action. "These sorts of strikes never achieve anything apart from damage," he said.

But as a result of impending strike action, the two sides got together at ACAS and came up with an agreement that the union are recommending their members accept.

Au contraire, Mr Cameron! I would have said the threat of strike action achieved a lot!

Did they listen?

Further to my rant about road signs blocking other roadsigns -

http://ericgreymatters.blogspot.com/2010/06/traffic-mismanagement.html

- they have moved it! You can now follow the sign to Laindon again - assuming you want to come to Laindon, of course.

Now, the big question is, "Did they move it because they read my blog?"

By the way, I have another sign-blocking-sign to bring you; just as soon as I get my camera out ...

Le Saucier

We're back home from France now, and we'd like to say a big thank you to our hosts whilst there - we had a great time!

One particular item of interest was their "sauce maker". It heats up the liquid whilst continually stirring the mixture. See the (very) short video, just to give you a flavour of the sauce maker (but not of the sauce itself!).

We were so impressed, we started trawling the Internet to see where we could purchase one in England. But we could find no mention of it. However, we managed to get our one on French eBay. Vive Le Saucier!

The wonders of technology!

Decisions, decisions ...

Whilst away on holiday, I read an article in The Times. It was about the difficulty we have making decisions, because we have too many choices. It says the average supermarket has about 10,000 different products on its shelves.

I remember when we went down to our local shop, run by Mr. Griffiths, for our groceries. You couldn't fit more than about 6 people in the shop, yet we managed to buy most of what we needed. AND he served you! Do you remember those days? He had a marble counter and he wrote on it the price of each item you bought on the counter with a pencil, then he added them all up. Do you remember those days when people things added up?

But back to today. If you shop online at Tesco's and search for 'cereals', you get back 346 items. It used to be just Corn Flakes, Rice Krispies, Weetabix or Shredded Wheat. And Mr. Griffiths stocked them all!

So there's the problem, we have so much choice these days, it makes us more indecisive. The article tells of the jam experiment, where, apparently, people bought ten times less jam when presented with 24 varieties than when their choice was six! But even six seems about three too many!

But back to the article again. They reported on various surveys and we are a "nation crippled by too much choice". In fact, in one study a third of people described themselves as "very indecisive". But what I want to know is, How did they manage to come to that decision?

Steak and Kidney!

When the kids were young, we had a touring caravan and used it for a number of holidays. We did a minimum of cooking (we were on holiday!) and couldn't afford meals out, so a favourite was a Fray Bentos steak and kidney pie, with tinned new potatoes and tinned peas. Just a tin opener was needed!

This is clearly fondly remembered by one of our daughters - for when we suggested we might have one a few weeks ago, the response was, "I'm salivating already!"

But back to our week here in France. We went into the local supermarket - Carrefour - and I noticed a small section of one aisle labelled Angleterre. Interested to find out what they considered English, there they were! Fray Bentos steak and kidney pies! As you can see, the picture proves it!


Clearly steak and kidney pies are quintessentially English.


Click on the picture for a larger image and to see what else is 'English'.

How to get an extra craft knife ...

Wandering around the local market (see blog below), I found a way of getting a craft knife free! The packet (pictured) says there are three, but look, a fourth has crept in unseen by the chinese manufacturer!

What a bargain!

It was, actually, a bargain, as it was in the "everything costs 1€" box. We also bought a jumbo thermometer, for our garden back home. It is currently registering 36 degrees here. Just thought you'd like to know!

Here we are in the South of France! We have snatched a week's holiday with one of my wife's cousins who lives over here.

Just to make you envious, the picture is taken from the kitchen window.

As soon as I'd taken the picture I scuttled out of the kitchen - well, I am on holiday!

Well packaged

I received a small parcel recently. I ripped off the cellophane to reveal a cardboard box. In it was a plastic tray, which had another cardboard box in it. So I removed the box from the tray and opened it, to reveal some bubble wrap. After I got rid of that, there was more cellophane wrap, and inside that - my card reader for my new Tesco savings account!

In order to log on, I have to type in my customer number, then digits of my PIN, then characters from my password. For certain transactions I have to put my recently received card into my recently unwrapped card reader and type in yet another PIN!

They say all this security is for my benefit. What they mean is that managing an account online is a highly hazardous thing to do and they are making it as difficult as possible for fraudsters to gain access to my money - and by so doing, it's pretty hard for ME to access my money.

I'm not sure which took longer - accessing my account through all the layers of security, or accessing my card reader through all the layers of packaging.

The letter that accompanied one PIN told me to memorise it immediately and destroy the letter. Like I'm supposed to do with all the other PINs and passwords I have - from other savings, credit card, debit card, even my library card!

And of course, if someone DID manage to hack in to my account, it must be my fault for not keeping my PIN secure!

I have to admit that I almost cancelled the account because of all the security. But then I remembered the interest rate! But I also must remember that, in a year's time I'll have to go through it all again, when the bonus interest rate ends.

Oh dear!

Out for the night?

A few days ago I asked my wife if she wanted to do anything that evening. She asked, "Like what?" So I said, "Well, we could go out and paint the town red!"

But we agreed we were too old for that, so I suggested we might go out and paint the town beige.

Actually, we stayed in and watched tele ...

The joke I didn't tell.

Yesterday I went on a one day course organised by the Eastern Baptist Association for ministers. It was called "Peer Supervision." I'd said to the family that if they asked all the attendees at the beginning of the course, "Why have you come on this peer supervision course?" I would say, "Because I hope to get a job with Southend Corporation."

Well, the course leader asked that very question, almost word-for-word. But I bottled out!

Perhaps I don't want to always be the "class clown".

This really is the end.

When a Southend bound train comes into Laindon station, even if it's only four carriages long, it goes right up to the end of the platform. This is rather annoying, as the exit is at the beginning of the platform.

I asked a friend of mine who knows about these things (as he works for a major train company) and he told me why. In order for the driver to ensure all passengers are safely aboard, he looks through a large mirror situated on the station, just by where he stops. At the four carriage stop, the mirror had been smashed by vandals shooting at it from the road bridge.

The railway replaced it (and they are not cheap, I'm assured), only for the same thing to happen again. At which point they gave up, and now the trains run to the end of the station, where the mirror is out of range of the bridge.

I did have a rather radical suggestion, "Why doesn't the driver lean out of his window and look back down the train?" But that was greeted with a sharp intake of breath! To me, sometimes the obvious solutions are not only the cheapest, but also the best!

But, hey, who am I? I'm not a railway manager!

Actually this whole thing reminds me of something I read some time ago. In the days of the USA versus Russia space race, both nations had a problem. A ball point pen would not write properly in zero gravity (try writing with the pen going upwards and you can see the problem).

The Americans put in thousands of dollars of research in order to create a pen that would write in space. The Russians had another idea - they sent their astronauts up with a pencil.

Simple, but effective.

Taking leave of our Census

(Sorry about the pun in the title!) The government announced yesterday that next year's census would be the last of its kind. They say there are more efficient ways of picking up information, from the Post Office, local government and credit checking agencies.

But they've forgotten another source of information. With our Club Card, Tesco knows more about us than anyone else!

Fakes and mistakes ...

Last Monday we went to the National Gallery to see their new exhibition, Close Examination: Fakes, Mistakes & Discoveries. It tells the stories behind various paintings, whether they are genuine and changes that have been made to them.

As various scientific methods have been employed on the pictures, it's a kind of art meets science. Like when Doctor Who visited Van Gogh (OK, that's science fiction meets art!). Being more on the science side than the arts side, but knowing I ought to appreciate art, I thought I'd enjoy this exhibition and I did.

There was, for instance, the painting "Woman at a window", a picture of a demure Victorian lady. But when they got to work on it, they found she had been "touched up" and she was originally much more provocative and probably no lady! See for more information:

www.nationalgallery.org.uk/paintings/research/woman-at-a-window

Then there was the portrait that had been altered, so that the man now had a cleaver in his head and a dagger in his chest! But his vague smile was unaltered.

But perhaps my favourite was the restorer in the 1930's who was working on Il Tramonto (The Sunset) by Giorgione. At one point the canvas was so damaged, it had to be replaced, and to disguise this, he painted on it a mounted St George slaying the dragon. Maybe he wanted to put an English 'stamp' on the painting!

As I said, a very enjoyable afternoon, well worth the visit, including the 15 minute film giving more detail.

Traffic Mismanagement

Have you noticed how there seems to be a never-ending array of road signs that go up all along our roads.

For instance, there a "New crossing ahead" sign two doors down from us, concerning a zebra crossing that has been there ever since we moved in nearly a year ago and judging by the state of the crossing markings, has been there considerably longer!

I bet it's no-one's job to take old signs down, only to put new ones up. But I must admit the sign does act as an indicator that I'm just about to get to my house, so I don't drive past it!

However, the photo (right) is of another incredible bungle by someone. On the Southend Arterial Road (A127) there's a direction sign off to Laindon, where we live. However, they've just put in a speed restriction, so they decided to erect a "Speed cameras" right in front of the direction sign, as you can probably see from the picture. Sorry it's not very clear, but it was taken through the windscreen as we travelled down the road.

So here's a message to all those who may come to visit us from the direction of Southend:-

Take the turning where you would have read "Laindon" if the direction sign was not totally blocked by the "Speed cameras" sign.

Joke just in

Just received the following from a friend:

The Family Court was in session. The judge had to decide who was to have custody of the sons. The judge asked the boys if they wanted to live with their Mum. They said no, because she beat them. So he asked if they wanted to live with their Dad. Again, they said no, because he beat them. So the judge asked them, "Who do want to live with?" They replied they wanted to live with the England football team because they don't beat anyone.

My thanks to Zac's nephew for that!

Be still and know ...

"Be still" says the Psalm (Psalm 46:10). But I don't find it easy. When I get down to the church office in the morning there are always plenty of things to do, so I want to "get on". But God wants me to be still and know his presence.

So I've developed a new tactic. The temptation is to switch on the computer straight away as it takes a fair amount of time to load everything up. But if I do that, I get distracted by emails, etc. So I don't turn on the monitor. When it goes quiet, I know it's time to enter in my password, and I can do that without the screen. Then, as I have an email "hot key", I can press that and know the emails are loading up.

Then, when I've had a time of quiet, I can switch on the monitor, and all is ready to go!

This morning I was pointed to the hymn "Dear Lord and Father of mankind", so I re-read the words. It reminds us that our words and works can drown out the "tender whisper" of his call and cause us to miss his blessing.

Then I read these words, God whispers in order to draw us closer to him.... Through his voice, I begin to recognize not just the handiwork of what he does, but the heartbeat of who he is. (Margaret Feinberg, The Organic God, p. 96)

I still need to learn the lesson of being still, and knowing God's presence, but maybe I'm slowly getting there. One day I might even be able to NOT switch on my office computer as soon as I get in!

Fond of a font

I read an article recently that said most typesetters despise the font "Comic Sans MS". What a travesty! It's a great font!

In fact I shall attempt to type the rest of this blog entry in that very font. It has a friendly, informal look to it. AND the font is one of the few that do a small 'a' in the way we actually write it, so my wife confirms that it's helpful for children to read.

So let's hear it for Comic Sans! My friends, use it whenever you can! Show these 'experts' what we think of their disdain!

(If the above hasn't come out in Comic Sans, then you've probably not got it in your font library, so why not?? It also shows I've been mugging up on using HTML, in order to get the font to come out in the first place!)

Would my Grandmother have watched the football match?

As I sat thinking about our football win yesterday, and the fact that Basildon town centre was very quiet (as no doubt were other town centres), I began wondering whether my Grandma would have watched the game.

You see, she only ever watched one game a year, the FA Cup Final. I don't know why this was, it just was. And I started to think, maybe she would have added that game to her football watching portfolio.

And then I realised - of course she wouldn't have watched it! It was on a weekday afternoon and you don't watch television on weekday afternoons! There were so many other things to do on a Wednesday afternoon, no time for that football nonsense!

Sadly, our country's work ethic has deteriorated over the years...

Sorry about the lack of entries

Sorry about the lack of entries on my blog page in recent days. But I'm back now!

So, what can I comment on? Well, there's the budget. Is it the necessary medicine the country needs as the Tories are saying? Or is it a terrible mistake as Labour are saying? (note, for obvious reasons the Lib-Dems are saying very little!)

My answer is, "I don't know." I hear both arguments but don't know which, if ether, are right. And, of course, we'll never know, unless we pull very swiftly out of recession, which seems unlikely. And if we don't, would Labour's solution have been any more effective? Quite simply, we'll never know!

But onto more important things - the World Cup. It's the crucial match this afternoon (if you're reading this later, I'm referring to the match against Slovenia).

I hear that a Primary School is closing half an hour early so people can watch the match! What IS that all about? School finishes at around 3 pm anyway, so they'll only miss about 15 minutes! And they can always press 'record', so any goals scored in that time can still be seen (assuming they are scored by England in the back of the opponent's net!).

Football Season

My wife bought a second hand 'fluffy' football, suitable for our small grandchildren to play with indoors, in keeping with the current World Cup mania.

Because it was second hand she decided to wash it. It came up well, see picture.

You see, she took note of the washing instructions, which read, "Do not iron".

Just as well she read them; I mean it's an easy mistake to make ...

Maybe not, if you wanted a rugby football!

We had need to visit Chadwell St Mary and saw a sign to "Grays Beach". It was one of those brown tourist signs. Those of you who know this part of Essex may well be surprised, like us, to find a beach so far down the Thames towards London (maybe it's the "last resort").

Intrigued, we followed the signs, and found a park by the river. The river shore itself was mud. But "land" side of the high sea wall was a large children's play area, with sand. Also a paddling pool and adventure golf, although this was closed due to tree roots growing in it! I'd have thought that would have just made it more adventurous!

As the large power station (or whatever it is) is to the east, it doesn't block the sun. However,it was pleasant enough. But we had to go to Basildon town centre so off we went. I must admit, until that moment, I didn't think I'd be saying we were going up-market to Basildon!

We parked in the multi-storey car park. The minimum rate was 90p. The machine had two notices on it:
"No change given"
"Overpayment accepted"

They could have been more honest and written, "You're bound not to have 90p in coins, so just pay us £1 and we'll keep the 10p!"

That's over 11% as a tip to NCP. (Yes, it is - work it out, it's 11.1% to be more accurate!)

But I DID have 90p in change! So, got you NCP!

In the news ...

I heard on the news this morning that those who clean their teeth once a day or less are 70% more likely to develop heart disease.

So, forget the healthy diets! Eat the doughnuts and the fried breakfasts!

AS LONG AS YOU CLEAN YOUR TEETH AFTERWARDS!

A2A - the finale

Ashes to Ashes bowed out on Friday. All would be explained we were told. And it was, or at least I think it was. It turned out that they were all in a kind of purgatory for police officers killed on duty. DCI Gene Hunt was their saviour leading them through to heaven and Keats was the devil trying to entice them down to hell.

In fact Ray, Chris and Shaz were also 'dead' but they didn't realise it until the final episode. After the last triumph of law enforcement, they were ready to enter the 'pub' - which had an ethereal glow coming from within.

There was even a time when Keats had a punch up with Hunt and looked as if he, the devil, had won. Hunt didn't exactly rise from the dead, but recovered enough to have the final triumph.

So Alex Drake had been dead for some time and wasn't going to see her beloved daughter after all. But Hunt said she'd be OK, so I suppose that's alright then.

Who'd have thought that A2A was deeply spiritual? It just goes to show you can't get away from our spirituality!

However, there were a few things that made you think the script writers only thought of this ending about half way through the last series. Why didn't Ray Chris and Shaz realise they were in fact dead, or at least in a different world, as Alex did? Why did DCI Gene Hunt have to stay in that purgatory - he was dead as well, did I mention that?

Maybe it was because Hunt had more people to see through purgatory into 'pub' heaven. In the very last seconds, someone else suddenly appears in the police station, demanding to know who's nicked his Ipod. Oh no, I hope that's not a signal for another series!

Spotted whilst wandering

Well, is this advert meant to be upside down?

And I think someone took the sign a little too seriously.

Tolerance or not?

I was reading the 'aims' of a worship service held in a hospice. It had two aims. The first was to provide a service of worship for Christian believers and the second was to provide a period of reflection for all, regardless of faith (and all the other inclusivities). This second aim is clearly so as to appear inclusive and not offend anyone. However, the two aims are rather mutually exclusive.

If you are holding a service of worship for a particular religion, it is not easy to bring in other faiths without compromising your own beliefs. I would not feel comfortable in worship service of another religion and for most religions, they would not feel comfortable in a Christian service.

And there's nothing wrong with that! It's all about having a faith which we really believe in.

At the Baptist Assembly (held in Plymouth recently), Amy Orr-Ewing spoke powerfully about tolerance of other faiths. She said there was nothing intolerant in saying we believe that only in Jesus can you be saved and go to heaven. We are intolerant only if we do not respect others with differing views.

So the PC lobby have turned 'tolerance' on its head! They suggest it is intolerant to say that your religion is right and others are wrong. What in fact is intolerant is them objecting to you saying it.

A basic Baptist principle is freedom for everyone to practise their own faith, or to have no faith. That is far more tolerant than many PC people would want!

Hung or Balanced

Some journalists and commentators have said that the people of Britain voted for a hung parliament. No they didn't! If they voted for the Tory candidate, they did so because the they wanted a Tory government. Similarly for Labour voters. It may be that Lib Dem voters wanted a hung, or 'balanced' (as Nick Clegg preferred to call it) parliament, but they weren't in the majority.

The general view has been that a balanced parliament is not a good thing. We need a "strong" parliament, so we are told. But do we? A strong parliament means the majority party can push through their nutty right- or left-wing (depending on their colour) policies.

What we have are what I would call 'measured' decisions, to be made by our coalition.

If this coalition works (and that's a big 'if'!), could they change things so I could actually vote for a coalition next time?

Presumably that would be much more likely to happen with a PR system. And that's why, of course, the two main parties don't want it, and the Lib Dems sooooo do!

Money matters - so the markets say

In my blog on 7 May, I mentioned Mariella Frostrup's frustration about why we as a country still seem to be at the mercy of the money markets. I was interested to read yesterday Gary Younge's article in The Guardian entitled, The People have spoken. Don't let the Money Markets shout them down. It included this paragraph:

So the very sector we bailed out with public money, run by incompetent people who are once again paying themselves bonuses, is now threatening to destabilise the next government unless it fires thousands of low-paid workers, cuts their wages and withdraws the services to millions of mostly poor people.

I think that says it all really. Thank you, Gary.

You can read the whole article at

www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2010/may/10/people-markets-democracy-capitalism

The result of voting?

A lady interviewed by the press was upset. If she voted Lib Dem but didn't get Nick Clegg as Prime Minister she thought it "was a poor sign of our society." She gave an illustration, that if she ordered cheesecake in a restaurant she wouldn't expect to get apple pie !

Presumably she doesn't realise that voting in an election is a little different from ordering a sweet.


On the other hand, say all the customers had a vote on their favourite pudding - the choices were apple pie, cheesecake or ice cream. Then, everybody had to have the sweet that came top!

Unless, of course, there wasn't a clear majority. Then maybe the apple pie could get together with the ice cream. That sounds quite good, actually. Although I'd prefer custard.

Maybe I need to re-write this blog ...

Parliament is Hung Out

So it's a hung parliament. Or a balanced parliament as the minority parties prefer to call it. My view is whichever party runs the country they are going to be in for an extremely rough ride. They are going to have to make cuts, which won't be popular. What is happening on the continent will have its affect here, even though we are not part of the Eurozone.

On the election reporting last night, when it was mentioned that the 'markets' would not respond well to a 'hung parliament', Mariella Frostrup indicated her frustration that even after the banking crisis, we as a country are still at the mercy of the money markets. I'm with her there! Our country seems to sink or swim as a result of the 'markets'. Honestly, what is all that about?

But back to my original point, any party is going to have a rough ride and will soon be pretty unpopular with the voters. So my advice to Gordon Brown is, let David Cameron lead the country. He'll then get all the stick and in a year or so's time when we have another election, you can say your policies would have worked better, and maybe get a swing back to Labour!

Who knows?

Voting or betting?

On one of the BBC Radio News slots this morning, Alan Dedicote reported the high percentage of people who "hadn't yet decided who to back" in the election.

What?? Is tomorrow polling day or a horse race? I thought you voted for the person you thought was best for the country, you didn't back the one you thought would win!

Or have I got it wrong?

Train Journey

As our train was about to pull in to Fenchurch Street Station, the announcement told us we were about to reach our final destination. Isn't that tautologous? The final place the train stops at IS its destination.

I'm hoping my final destination is heaven! And that's got to be better than Fenchurch Street!

Five Daughters

We've just finished watching the final episode of the BBC drama Five Daughters which tells the story of the murders of five girls in Ipswich in 2006. We lived in Ipswich at the time of the murders and in a way we re-lived those difficult days through the drama. It was very well done, in spite of the uses of the 'F' word.

It is said that everyone knows where they were when they heard of President Kennedy's assassination. Well, I don't. But I will always remember where I was when the news broke that they had found two more bodies just off the Old Felixstowe Road. I was driving down the A14 from Felixstowe back to Ipswich in the afternoon, heading back to the church office to work. I saw the police helicopter hovering overhead and at the same time heard on the radio that their bodies had been found. There was that ache in the pit of my stomach. Instead of going back to the office, all I could do was drive home. Mercifully they were the last bodies to be found.

As we lived through those days and saw the press reports and the police news conferences, we were impressed that the police did not call them prostitutes, but women. This was in sharp contrast to some of the media. A charity was set up by the local paper and the local Council, Somebody's Daughter Memorial Fund to help users of addictive substances and their families; relieve distress amongst people working as prostitutes and education in misuse of drugs, etc.

Yes, we needed to remember that the young women were victims and that they had families - which the drama brought out.

I'd like to share with you some of the ways the churches were involved during that time. Clearly there was support of the families and the taking of the funerals, and some of my colleagues in Ipswich were involved in that. The churches organised prayer meetings, praying for the victims' families, praying that the killer would be caught and praying that the streets of Ipswich would become safe again. One of the meetings I went to, the father of one of the murdered girls spoke to us.

The centre of Ipswich had for some time been patrolled by our "Town Pastors" on Friday and Saturday nights. At the height of the investigation, in the days leading up to Christmas, the police asked if the Town Pastors could go out every night, which they did until the arrest was made.

Churches in the town centre were also reaching out to the girls on the streets, one church I know had a drop in centre.

Finally, currently in the advance stages of planning by churches is a Christian Therapeutic Community which will offer a residential programme to help women out of life-controlling addictions. This will be located on a farm outside Ipswich.

It is easy to forget how the churches were involved, were alongside the community and were reaching out. That part of the story is not often told. But that's what being a follower of Jesus is all about. Being, as Jesus said, "salt and light" in the community; and bringing hope and love where there is suffering and despair.

No New Tricks for Essex

Yesterday we watched an episode of New Tricks. It was on the television a week or so back, we recorded it and have just got round to viewing it.

And I must object. When Det. Chief Inspector Sandra Pullman said a body that was lost in the Thames, "was washed up in Essex", Gerry responded, "They're all washed up in Essex!" This is a slanderous slur on good Essex folk! If the Welsh can object when they are insulted and ginger haired people can object when they are insulted, then so can Essex!

So I want a statement made by Strickland, or some other officer of the Metropolitan Police please!




Oh, isn't it real? It's just a drama? The good people of Essex will be devastated to hear that!

More random ramblings

The "Green Chilli" Indian Takeaway has been relaunched! I know this because their menu has come through the letterbox. "Where is it?" you may ask. And that's the problem, although it's a takeaway, the menu doesn't actually give you their address!

But they do deliver and they list the seven local areas they cover. A pity they spell three of them wrongly! Come on! Employ an English proofreader!

But they do have a web site and you can find out their address there. And people have rated their service very well! Someone from Basildon gives them maximum points for Quality, Delivery time and Service. She says,

very freindly and polite staff ill definatly be back.

Maybe forget about the proofreader!

Oh, and we think that "Smothies" are not designed to asphyxiate but are "Smoothies".

------------------------------------------

We went into Basildon on Friday evening to the theatre and found that they have finished the improvements to the town centre. The new clock tower is there -- but the clock was half an hour slow!

And the new lighting is there. There are groups of six lights (see picture) and other lights, all painted purple. Except that, when we came out of the theatre and it was dark, the lighting wasn't working!

But never mind, when we went into the town centre this morning at 10.30 am, they were working (and the clock was still half an hour slow)!

"It's a Pound"

For some reason I can't remember, I came across the following video from You Tube where three items from Poundland are reviewed. It's quite entertaining. The address is

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ttkRU6c4eYU

One of the items reviewed was a mini vacuum cleaner which you plug into a USB socket and can clean between the keys of the keyboard! He did have a problem with it, but even so, this morning I popped into Poundland, saw one, and guess what, I bought it. It actually seems to work!

I think I'll pop back and buy a few more and that will be a number of Christmas present problems solved for later this year!

He mentions on the video that most of the electrical items are the "Signalex" brand. If you look around Poundland, you find there are various brands that you've not heard of before. For instance, "Let's DIY it!" for, believe it or not, DIY type goods, "Funtastic" for children's items and various others (I can't remember their names) for home, office, paper goods and so on.

And guess what! They all have the same postal address as Signalex! So there must be this one warehouse in Birmingham churning out 100's of items, all for Poundland.

By the way, there's also a second video, reviewing yet three more products ("Poundland Special 2"). It will no doubt come up if you go to the first video.

Happy watching and happy shopping!

Back again!

My apologies to all my loyal readers who have got fed up linking to my blog and finding no new entries. We had a week away at Spring Harvest and then time just seemed to disappear ... The picture, by the way, is the big top at Spring Harvest (a Christian festival held at Butlins) where the Bible studies and evening celebrations took place. The worship and speakers were great, but the weather was freezing.

Next, an addition to my previous blog below. The second book I mentioned was reviewed in the Baptist Times last week (I got there before they did!). They reviewed two books, one in favour of the case for theistic evolution and one against (the one I read). The BT reviewer was not terribly complimentary about Should Christians Embrace Evolution and said both sides in the debate have "further work ahead". To that last phrase I would certainly agree.

Creation or Evolution

Last Christmas twelve-month I was given (because I'd asked for it) a book entitled Creation or Evolution - Do we have to Choose? by Denis Alexander. It seemed a positive response to the problem Christians have about this subject. I blogged that I would let you know how I got on reading it. But I didn't! That was because I was disappointed. It answered questions I wasn't asking and didn't answer the questions I was asking!

Another book, Rescuing Darwin, subtitled God and evolution in Britain today, co-written by Denis Alexander and Nick Spencer was widely distributed - I received two free copies! But again, I was disappointed. For instance, they charicatured and then dismissed Intelligent Design, without really justifying their position.

Then, last year, another book came out, Should Christians Embrace Evolution? and subtitled, Biblical and scientific responses, edited by Norman C. Nevin. First of all, I don't think it's that well written. It consists of different people writing each chapter and I get the impression they scraped around a little to find people and articles to fill the book.

However, having said that, I found it much more satisfying than the earlier two books I mentioned. In fact, they hammer Denis Alexander's book from both scientific AND theological perspectives.

My favourite chapter is by RT Kendall, a study of the debate from the perspective of Hebrews 11:3, which says, "Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things that do appear." (NIV)

The answer Should Christians Embrace Evolution? gives to its title question is, 'No!' If you do, you compromise your theology and you put your 'faith' in a theory that has many unanswered questions to it. The book concludes, "No coherent, cohesive theology has yet been offered that would allow Christians to embrace evolution with integrity. Science has uncovered a great deal of empirical evidence that is challenging the Darwinian paradigm."

Put simply, if you don't want to accept evolution as the answer to the way we came to be here, then you are not necessarily putting yourself into an extreme fundamentalist camp which ignores or derides science. Rather, you are sitting alongside many scientists who are also Christians, and even some scientists who do not profess any faith!

Watch out! Election coming!

During two advertisement breaks in A Touch of Frost last night (wasn't it terrible about George, by the way?) we had the newsflash that Gordon Brown was going to see the Queen to begin the process of calling an election. Then, of course, the news after Frost was full of it.

This morning every news bulletin we heard on the radio was about the PM going to Buckingham Palace. Then this evening's news was all about the fact he had been and what the parties were saying.

Do you know, I'm bored with the election already!