Whilst waiting

We spent nearly two hours waiting in the Fracture Clinic, so one's mind turns to the proliferation of signs. Apostrophes seem to have become unfashionable, with "Childrens Play Area" and "VISITORS INFORMATION", both being properly made signs.


Then there was the problematic "No smoking sign" as opposite. People often want to stick it up with the diagonal red line either horizontal or vertical. The two we saw had it going horizontally. For one the cigarette was pointing north east, the other south west ( with the smoke going in an odd direction). I suspect the person sticking them to the wall didn't know which way round they went, so thought one must be right. A pity, really!

Is it a disability?

So, I have my leg in plaster from just above the ankle to just below the thigh, so that I am unable to bend my knee. I have to walk with crutches.

So I enquired if there was any way I could get a temporary disabled badge in order for my wife to park in a disabled bay to let me have a fighting chance of getting to my destination on crutches. But no, I've got to have the condition for a year to be "disabled". However, Harlow District Council does a temporary three month one, but no other part of Essex does.

I'm sure it all makes sense to someone somewhere ...

+++++++++++++

We went to Tesco's and as we had to go up to the first floor and the lift was at the back of the store. So they offered me an electric 'buggy', which I accepted. Rather embarrassing I thought, but we are unlikely to meet anyone we know ... So we just begin to go down the aisle, and there are two people from our church!

Although I've thought those buggies looked fun, and years ago I had a go in my father-in-law's one, I've changed my mind. I'd much rather walk!

Latest news

Just to let all my loyal readers know that we've just returned from the Fracture Clinic and the knee cap is healing well. Thank you to all those who are praying, God is working! They want to see me in four weeks' time, when the plaster just MIGHT come off.

Big Boys' Toys

I must admit to watching and enjoying James May's Toy Stories. A simple idea - James looks at some more traditional toys and then "bigs them up" (his phrase, not mine I hasten to add).

It is partly his wry humour, partly the whole idea of the show and partly they were my toys as well!

He started by looking at Airfix kits and managing to get made a life size kit of a WW2 spitfire, which a group assembled and it actually held together! It was wheeled out at a ceremony which included some people who had actually flown spitfires. Is was quite emotional!

He also managed to convince the Royal Horticultural Society to be allowed to enter a garden at their show made of Plasticine flowers! My favourite had to be the Scalextric track that went round the whole of what was Brooklands racetrack, which meant it had to go across a road, through offices, along people's front gardens, over a pond and other obstacles! And it was educational! I learned that many people, including me, pronounced the brand name wrongly. We normally say Scalectrix but it's Scalextric (or is it the other way round??).

The latest programme was the Lego house which he spent a night in. But there did seem to be a big jump from when the first floor was just in, to it being actually completed. We saw nothing of the construction of the roof (which no doubt was not watertight!) or many of the Lego 'items' like the Union flag made out of Lego on a wall and a number of kitchen items. Having said that the series has been a joy to watch and I'm looking forward to the Christmas one where he builds a massive model railway. I still have mine, packed in boxes in the loft!

Crackers!

Well, our two services went well yesterday, although because of the inclement weather there were fewer in the morning. But for the carols by candlelight in the evening, it was a fairly packed house!

I said I'd tell you what I did with the children, in case any of you do Christmas services, and it might appeal (if you're reading this, Heather, be warned I've already done it at Rushmere, although I doubt they'd remember!).

It was a cracker for Jesus, a giant cracker that we'd made. I said it was for Jesus but I'm sure he wouldn't mind if we pulled it for him! I then asked what's normally in a cracker, and got back a gift, a hat, a joke and a snap. I asked what's was the more traditional name for the joke and got the word I wanted, a motto. I said the cracker for Jesus had all these things except the snap, as it was too big. So when it was pulled, everyone had to shout "bang!"

Two children came up to help and pulled the cracker ("bang!" went the congregation). The we looked at the contents. First of all the paper hat. What kind of hat was it? A crown. Who wears a crown? A king. So this is a cracker for Jesus, as he's a King. I asked someone to read Matthew 2:1-2, where the wise men refer to Jesus as the King of the Jews.

So, we've established Jesus is King. What of the motto? It was Matthew 2:23, The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel, which means ‘God is with us.’ So Jesus is not only a King, but God himself!

So if this is a cracker for Jesus, what could we possibly give a King, who is also God? One of my helpers opened the present, it was a box and inside the box a paper heart, which he unfolded. Actually, Jesus doesn't demand expensive presents from us, all he wants is for us to love him - to give him out hearts.

We then sung in the bleak midwinter, and I quoted the last verse:

What can I give him, poor as I am?

If I were a shepherd, I would bring a lamb;

If I were a wise man, I would do my part.

Yet what I can I give him, give my heart.

News

Latest news! I don't need an operation on my knee. So that's good. I have an appointment at the fracture clinic on Christmas Eve, BEFORE lunch!

My request for prayer on my previous blog should include my wife who has to cope with me in plaster!

It IS broke,so please fix it!

Oh dear! I fell off my bike this morning on what I assume was black ice. I continued to cycle to the church as I didn't think there was too much damage. But moving round got harder and it started to swell, so it was off to A & E at Basildon Hospital.

After an x-ray they diagnosed a fractured patella (that's a broken kneecap to you and me). I'm home, plastered and on crutches. But I will probably have to go back for an operation.

So that's the latest news. All prayers would be appreciated, not just for me but for the church. Hopefully I'll be able to do the Christmas services this Sunday.

My thanks to all the staff who saw me at the hospital, no complaints at all!

No longer going round in circles

I heard about changes to the Circle Line on the London Underground that took effect from last Sunday, so I thought I'd look up on the Internet to find out more. It no longer goes round in a circle, but starts at Hammersmith following the Hammersmith & City Line route, then goes through Edgware Road and all the way round to Edgware Road again, where it terminates and goes back to Hammersmith.

The TfL website says, "Trains on the Circle line will become more reliable" and on some sections they will be more frequent. A pity, then, when I logged on this morning the website was reporting "severe delays" for the Circle, Hammersmith & City and Metropolitan lines.

Teething troubles trying to get all those trains into Edgware Road?

Where have all the Geobars gone?

I must admit I do like an apricot Geobar. In case you've not heard of them, Geobars are cereal bars made by Traidcraft, so they have the Fairtrade mark. They currently do apricot, chocolate, honey nut and mixed berry bars. The chocolate ones are common, but the Tesco and Sainsbury that we frequent seem to have stopped stocking any other flavours. Even the Oxfam shop in Brentwood only had chocolate ones the last time I went in, and the one at Billericay didn't seem to do any foodstuffs at all.

So what am I supposed to do? Well, I emailed Traidcraft to see if they have any of their "Fairtraders" in the area. Fairtraders are people who sell fairly traded in goods locally, maybe in a church setting. We had this ongoing email correspondence. She asked for my postcode and then responded that there were no Fairtraders locally. But I then thought about it. Our postcode is "SS" for Southend, although we're not that close to Southend. In fact not far away are "CM" postcodes which is Chelmsford.

So, when I informed her of this, she sent me a list of Fairtraders! One not far away at all, in Wickford. But alas! When I received that email I had just ordered some online direct from Traidcraft. The minimum number they do is a packet of 24 (as in the picture). I've ordered one apricot, one mixed berries and one honey nut. So we now have 72 Geobars!

If the Fairtrader lady in Wickford is reading this, when we've got through our 72 bars, we will be in touch - honest!

Rob Brydon on Gavin & Stacey was having problems with buying cereals for when the boys come round. I sympathise. As he said, in his day it was just Corn Flakes or Weetabix. Now the list is endless!

Sometimes when we're in the supermarket and we get to the cereals aisle, my wife says to me, "Choose one you like," I just stand there mesmerised! I normally go for Just Right, not because it's just right but because it more like Ok Really and I can't decide on anything else.

Stacey suggests he buys a Variety Pack, but he doesn't think it's a good idea. "Tell me this," he says, "Who would eat the Ricicles?" "Good point," Stacey observes.

But I have some other questions about Variety Packs. Why is it in a pack of eight there is always a duplicate? And why is it one of the more boring ones? Come on Kelloggs, you can do better than that! And another thing, how come when the daughter and two grand kids came and stayed over for one night last weekend, there was only three out of an eight Variety Pack left? Can someone tell me the answer to that?

[By the way, the Gavin & Stacey clip is eight minutes in to www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b007nf70 ]

Christmas at Church

A Baptist minister once said to me that he had to move to another church because he'd run out of ideas for things to do at Christmas! I've actually found that God has always inspired me to do something, hopefully, fairly creative each year. However, having moved church this year (NOT for the above reason, I must add!), I have plenty of resources up my sleeve - recycling at its best! Having said that, at the Beavers' carol service last week I re-told the Christmas story in a way I've not done before.

First of all, let me say I believe the Christmas story needs to be re-told each year. I know we did it last year, but that's the point of celebrating Christmas, re-telling the story, so the next generation hear it. I took along some Christmas cards and, showing them one at a time, asked them whether the picture on the front was part of the Christmas story or not. We sorted them into two piles. My favourite was one of Santa in shorts sitting on a beach! They thought it was fairly odd until I pointed out the words on the front, "Happy Christmas from down under!" It was from a friend of ours who lives in Australia.

Having discarded the cards that weren't part of the Christmas story, I then went through the rest of the cards, telling the story as I went. I also scanned in the cards, so they came up on a PowerPoint presentation, to ensure even those at the back could see them.

You need, of course, to have cards that go through the different aspects of the story. If you think it's a good idea, go through the Christmas cards you receive and keep a selection for next year (assuming you've planned your Christmas talks already for this year!).

I'm also doing a "Cracker for Jesus" on Sunday and pulling some smaller crackers on Christmas Day. I'll blog about them later - but not until I've done them - some of my congregation read this blog!

A Media Prayer

I read a prayer yesterday. It was prayed at the first Daily Service broadcast by the BBC in 1932. Although the wording in places was not what we'd use today, the sentiments seemed just as appropriate now. Not just for radio but for television also; and not just for the BBC, but for all radio and TV stations.

So here is the prayer, slightly updated by me to fit today's scene:

O God, we ask your blessing on all who have the responsibility of directing the affairs of the BBC and all radio and television stations in our land. Grant them courage and divine common sense, so that listeners and viewers may receive real re-creation of mind and spirit, and truth may flourish in our land and go forward to the ends of the earth.

Inspire all who speak or sing or play with noble ideals, that they may give of their best whether light-hearted or grave, instructive or humourous - that all may feel they are filling a real purpose in life for the common good.

We ask it through Jesus Christ our Lord.

It seems to me a prayer that really needs to be prayed these days! So, if you pray, take a moment to pray that prayer today.

Free at last?

I heard yesterday that the SNP want to hold a referendum in Scotland as to whether it should become independent. However, Labour, Conservative and Lib Dem MSPs say they will combine to oppose the idea of a referendum.

I just thought, if the SNP want a "yes" vote for Scottish Independence, why don't they hold the referendum in England?